{"id":71146,"date":"2024-03-22T16:51:36","date_gmt":"2024-03-22T09:51:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alternatech.net\/?p=71146"},"modified":"2024-03-22T16:51:36","modified_gmt":"2024-03-22T09:51:36","slug":"a-guy-walks-into-a-bar-with-two-black-eyes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/a-guy-walks-into-a-bar-with-two-black-eyes\/","title":{"rendered":"A guy walks into a bar with two black eyes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style='\"font-size:'>A guy walks into a bar with two black eyes after a church service.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>His friend ask<strong> \u201cDale, what the hell happened to your face?\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWhen the lady sitting in front of me stood up to sing the hymns,\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>I noticed her dress was clutched between her butt cheeks,\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>so, being poIite I pulled it out, she turned around and punched me in the eye.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWell, how did you get the other black eye?\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cShe got so upset that I pulled the dress out,\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>I figured I would just push it right back in. \u201c\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A guy walks into a bar with two black eyes after a church service. His friend ask \u201cDale, what the hell happened to your face?\u201d \u201cWhen the lady sitting in front of me stood up to sing the hymns, I noticed her dress was clutched between her butt cheeks, so, being poIite I pulled it\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":71147,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"A guy walks into a bar with two black eyes after a church service. His friend ask \u201cDale, what the hell happened to your face?\u201d","_seopress_robots_index":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[676],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-71146","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-jokes"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/A-guy-walks-into-a-bar-with-two-black-eyes.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71146","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=71146"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/71146\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/71147"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=71146"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=71146"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/justmetalking.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=71146"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}</p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></span></p>